The Dos and Don’ts of Dating after 40

man and woman in their fortiesDating in your forties or later can have some unique challenges. People get divorced, have kids, accumulate debt, and, well, let’s just say that we all have baggage.

However, it can actually be easier as people are less likely to change major things in their lives after 40, and they’re wise enough to know what they want and what they don’t want.

Keeping the right attitude, reminding yourself that dating and finding relationship is a process, and making the right choices (and heeding the advice below) will help you on your way to a successful dating experience.

DO give online dating a chance.

Online dating websites have succeeded in becoming the best way to meet people en masse. Whether you’re career-oriented or a single parent, many people don’t have the time to have drinks after work with friends or sit for hours at Starbucks in hopes they’ll casually meet someone attractive and like-minded.

Signing up for multiple dating websites or specialty websites may speed up the “in person” dating process, plus it’ll give you practice with flirting, texting, instant messaging and other 21st century dating strategies that may not be your forte.

DON’T date TOO young.

This rule goes for both sexes. A 20-year-old date is most likely based on just physical attraction. Without common interests, values, goals, and mental and physical attraction, dating someone long-term is hopeless. Look for people who are closer to your age and have the same interests as you.

DO pay attention to romance.

You still have at least 30 more years of sex in your lifetime (if you want to)! Making decisions based on just physical attraction can make dating more complicated in the long run. Looks unfortunately fade, but a real attraction and strong romantic bond can be forever. It’s important to look for people you’re attracted to; but more importantly, you want them to be romantic and like-minded so that when the sex fades, you’re still in the relationship because you love and enjoy your spouse.

DON’T settle!

Take your time and carefully choose the people with whom you could potentially go on dates. There’s no need to rush into dating someone just because you don’t want to be single. Further, you’re not obligated to meet anyone who doesn’t seem like a good fit. Think about all the people you’ve dated in your lifetime and remember that building relationships takes time.

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